First and foremost, I'd like to introduce you all to the incomparable Ms.Jeanne Simpson. Brilliant. Talented. Beautiful. Deadly. Go beyond the blurb and check out her page.

 

Jeanne and I met back in '94. She's an actress, a choreographer, and a dancer. A teacher. An Oklahoma girl raised near Dallas. A Harvard grad.

Am I outa my league? Oh, yeah. But lucky.

Jeanne also stoically endures my geekier instincts, including (as you can see) my hamhanded attempts to electronically Vargasize her. At left is my very first ever Photoshop effort, which I've left up here because... well, it's Jeanne. And it reminds me how far I've come with Photoshop.

 


When I'm not clumsily objectifying the woman of my dreams, the two of us live busily and happily in Park Slope, Brooklyn. It's a gorgeous neighborhood that leaves us only a quick subway ride to Times Square. But the 'hood's getting increasingly posh and expensive, so I won't brag about it any more on these pages. Stay away. You'd hate it. It's unliveable. The rats are so big that they herd sheep in the park...


I was born and raised in Nassau County, Long Island. The only reason I won't call it a "sterile" environment is that it seems to have become a really popular place to contract cancer. Future forms of malignancies will no doubt be named after Long Island municipalities, as in, "I've got bad news for you Sid, that wart seems to have metasticized into an acute Levittownoma..."

Despite the fact that most culture on Long Island comes filtered through a cathode ray tube, I had a great childhood. Lots of friends, solid public school education, and, above all, two parents who understood the value of crammin' some worldly knowledge and book learnin' into their fuzzy-headed offspring.

Mom's a novelist, with a scad of books printed under the name of Edith Layton. Her homepage puts this one to shame. I have an older brother (Michael) and a younger sister (Susie). Susie's basically a good-looking female version of me, and she's been burning up the NY comedy scene for the past few years.

 

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