There is no official group name for a gathering of Felbers. My people have often tried. We’ve tried to go with “herd,” “flock,” even “hive.” “A corporation of Felbers” sounded too cold. “A murder of Felbers” was popular briefly due to our famous persistence and how cool it sounded, but it proved, during the last century, to give certain people a few too many ideas. “An exhalation of Felbers” seemed nice, but it was eventually deemed too appropriate, for the same reasons that we rejected “a drunken pile of Felbers.”
So we’re still working on it.
Nevertheless, we do gather. And this was in evidence last weekend, when noted author Edith Layton Felber, on the occasion of her birthday, came to Chicago to meet Jeanne and myself for a taping of “Wait Wait,” a barbecue, and - naturally - more than a few drinks.
[East meets west in Chicago summit. The birthday girl and her creepy stalker.]
The show itself went pretty well, though Roxanne Roberts cruelly chose to disgrace me in the Lightning Round in front of my own mother. Shame, Roxanne, shame.
[Me, Roxanne, and P.J. O’Rourke enjoying a candid, unposed moment.]
Peter eventually led the audience in a chorus of “Happy Birthday” for Ms. Layton. If you’ve never had an auditorium full of NPR fans singing at you, well… they are as liberal with their choice of keys as they are with their politics. Myself included.
[PJ, Roxanne, Carl, some Felbers, and Marianne Foster (Carl’s wife!). There really
WAS an audience there at one point…]
The party then moved to a local restaurant, where PJ unveiled his latest invention, the “scotch helmet” (not shown). There was birthday cake, and a fair amount uselessly begging Amanda Gibson not to leave us.
[Amanda Gibson (*sniff*), Mike Danforth, and Emily Ecton showing why America is still
#1 from a dental perspective; Peter is not nearly as drunk as he looks, while
Jeanne is much much drunker.]
Eventually, Peter finally got his long-awaited photo op with my mom’s brand new book, which is hitting store shelves… right about now.
[Sagal says: “Edith Layton’s latest novel is remarkably gentle on my face and
makes my skin feel great!”]
All in all, our all-star birthday extravaganza for the woman who calls herself “Old Mother Felber” was a smashing success. As for the city of Chicago… um… I’m told that it’s still standing and is willing to welcome us Felbers back “at some point over the next decade (but please check with us first).” As far as we’re concerned, those are pretty good terms.
Fanny Roborat
60 comments
David
June 1, 2006 at 6:42 pm
1I have to compare learning what you look like to my experience as a child when I first saw Arthur Godfrey on my Aunt Naomi’s television in Covington, Kentucky. It was 1950, I was 8, and I’d been listening to the Arthur Godfrey Show since I knew what a radio was. There was absolutely no connection whatsoever between my mental picture of him and his actual appearance. Still fascinates me.
Roxanne really did wax your butt.
Mojo
June 1, 2006 at 7:14 pm
2Perhaps you could be “a paradox of Felbers”. It sounds nice, would help to explain why you look as you do when all of the others in your family are presentable and, most importantly, it makes a great product tie-in with your book.
Marketing uber alles!
Julia
June 1, 2006 at 7:19 pm
3…why an exhalation of Felbers, when an inhalation might be so much more, well, positive, don’t you think? (Of course you would all have to commit to continuing to take personal hygiene seriously…)
Julia
June 1, 2006 at 7:20 pm
4Ooops and a happy belated to Mother Felber.
Ann
June 1, 2006 at 8:06 pm
5Yes, happy birthday indeed to Madame Layton. My condolences on the cheesy cover art, but I’m sure the book will be a delightful read.
Jay
June 1, 2006 at 8:35 pm
6A college friend whose Mom also wrote romance novels said the real sign of an author’s success was the relative size of the author’s name and the book’s title. Based on that comparison, I would say that Mother Felber definitely has hit the big time. (pun intended) Congratulations and best wishes for many more years of writing.
Jay
dee
June 1, 2006 at 8:37 pm
7Many happy returns to Ms. Layton! I’m sure the celebration was sufficiently festive, though tempered by the imminent departure of the lovely Ms. Gibson. I’m sure she thinks she’s moving on to greener pastures, but I can’t imagine any other job with perks like this.
cooper
June 1, 2006 at 9:01 pm
8OH MY GOD, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAIR!! Probably the same thing that happened to Peter’s (and mine). Good thing “skull” is in, huh? Imagine a drunken pile of boomers, still going for the big hair look, but with nothing on top - half a generation looking like Larry Fine or worse, Bozo the Clown.
So, Happy Birthday Edith Felber! What is it now, 39? Jack Benny was on to a good thing, right? And you certainly don’t look a day older. Kiss, kiss. Many happy returns!
Ann, you have great taste and your Tahoe commercials are the bomb (do kids still say that?), but the boys in marketing know that cheesy cover art moves product. You have to admit that America’s cultural bar is set pretty low. Ergo, cheesy cover art.
Murray
June 1, 2006 at 10:28 pm
9Well there’s also a
Crash of Rhinos
A Knot of Toads
Skulk of Foxes
Parliament of Owls
Kettle of Hawks
Charm of Finches
Exaltation of Larks
and my favorite and own invention
An Omen of Vultures.
But a drunken pile works too.
Perhaps we can still celebrate when the Drunken Pile…er.Exaltation of Felbers alights at Grouseland in a couple of months.
Maximum Bob
June 1, 2006 at 11:04 pm
10Your pictures confirm what I’ve long suspected: somewhere, someone is having a lot more fun than I am. Thanks for nothing!
SeattleDan
June 1, 2006 at 11:21 pm
11Any chance Peter Sagal will be adapting Ms.Edith’s work for the stage? I think it is a natural!
And Happy Birthday Old Mother Felber!
Matt
June 2, 2006 at 12:05 am
12never seen a drunken pile . . .
I think I saw some drunkards with piles . . .
but surgical internship was a long time ago.
ginny
June 2, 2006 at 1:03 am
13On the collective noun topic: this seems too obvious to me, so I’m sure someone will come up with a better one: “a funny of Felbers.”
On the Old Mother Felber front: Holy cow, your mom is hot! In a nice way, of course.
On the Lightning Round debacle: how does it feel being the waxee rather than the waxer??? Lather, rinse, repeat the mantra.
On the WWDTM Birthday Show Envy theme: GRR! This sounds like it was an awesome show! See you next week; please be just as awesome against both Paula and Roxanne. If photos are allowed, my husband will not use flash or I will duct-tape his hands to the seatrests.
siobhan
June 2, 2006 at 1:41 am
14Adam, you’re like, an Angelo these days - right? So, like, why don’t you totally get WWDTM to come to SF? ‘Cuz there are, like, beauCOUP peeps here who would be ALL OVER that show. It’s a quick flight for you, and O’Hare to SFO is hub-to-hub on Untied for the others. Hell, I’d donate mileage for their flights if it would help. Maybe the Seattlites would come down, too. And then some book tour stops in town…
(Or is the problem that the Bay Area is full of NPR junkies and we’d all be shouting out answers and going “well DUH!” to anyone who missed? I mean, what is it with some of those contestants? They must only listen for 4 or 5 hours a day.)
siobhan
June 2, 2006 at 1:44 am
15BTW - as a birder, I’m into the whole collective noun thing. I lean toward a “compendium of Felbers”, myself.
David
June 2, 2006 at 2:09 am
16What with WW,DTM being a radio show and all, what about a Frequency of Felbers - ‘course I guess they’d need to be a Catholic family of about 14 or so for that to really work.
cooper
June 2, 2006 at 7:41 am
17matt, now there’s a mental image! And being a surgical intern, you were not assigned to treating the “drunkard” part of the equation, I take it. Poor lad!
david
June 2, 2006 at 7:44 am
18Hey, Ginny, I will NOT use flash during the show. No need for duct tape.
Hmmm … since more than one of the felbers have bee published, how about a “Shelf of Felbers” … or maybe a “Stack of Felbers” (as in library stacks)? Are the books available as eBooks yet? If so, they might be a “(i)Pod of Felbers”.
I could go on … but I need to eat my breakfast.
Chuggo
June 2, 2006 at 10:01 am
19I would like to comment on the really ostentacious stage setting used for WWDTM. My goodness, I realize it’s a radio show, but can’t you tone it down a little? And what’s that on the little table to the left of Adam? It looks like a little alien spaceship, except there’s a cord coming out. Possibly a listening device? Or could it be a barbeque grill? And where does the cord go? I’ll bet straight to PJ, he looks amused.
And what are you doing in that picture Adam? I hope you are about to take a drink of water, but you look WAY too happy.
Best wishes to your mom, I like that necklace she’s wearing.
Old Mother Felber
June 2, 2006 at 10:49 am
20O what a time I had!
Everyone was so charming and kind - I was delighted to find that Adam had found such good playmates.
Memorable.
I hated to leave, but you know a flock of Felbers always ends in a flight of Felbers.
Now back to the keyboard and Miss Daisy, but O such memories!
And thanking you all for your birthday wishes!
margaret
June 2, 2006 at 12:12 pm
21Wow, I’m having flashbacks.
I was once somewhat involved in a Felber confab in Chicago, some years back.
And one in Dallas. Or Ft. Worth.
And several in NY.
So happy to know Edith’s birthday was celebrated in style and with much mirth.
Mary
June 2, 2006 at 3:18 pm
22A belated Happy Birthday to dear Ms. Layton. By looks of the photo, I fear we may be very close in age so would you consider dropping the “Old” part? ;-D
Sad news (to me): just found out that my vet tech classes start August 24 - two weeks before everyone else - thus I will be missing Felberpalooza. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!
madbard
June 2, 2006 at 3:59 pm
23A “fabulous” of Felbers?
Single H. Monad
June 2, 2006 at 4:05 pm
24Peter, if you’re reading, make the leap to the screen (big or small). You can do it.
Maximum Bob
June 2, 2006 at 5:11 pm
25The correct collective noun is “conspiracy.”
Murray
June 2, 2006 at 7:03 pm
26Mary say it aint so.
I was looking forward to a Wolverine section singing “Hail to the Victors” at the top of our lungs. (over and over again)
Murray
June 2, 2006 at 7:07 pm
27O, Mother Felber,
From your picture, you look almost exactly like Susie. (Take that as a big compliment) (Oh, and Miss Daisy looks almost exactly like CODA, my dog).
Ann
June 2, 2006 at 7:13 pm
28Mother Felber’s work is occasionally noted on this Web site: http://www.smartbitchestrashybooks.com/index.php
(NO idea how to make that a link, so have my fingers crossed.)
They like to make fun of bad book covers, among other things. Her writing is admired, however.
dee
June 2, 2006 at 7:32 pm
29Mary! We’ll write you an excuse. In the meantime, start sounding concerned about your great-aunt who was like a mother to you and whose health is getting more precarious every day.
And Murray…The Victors, Varsity, Hurrah for the Yellow and Blue…we can still send everyone else away in droves.
cooper
June 2, 2006 at 10:25 pm
30Off target, but darned important! Ann Coulter has lawyered up! The right wing’s favorite chanteuse of blather and “Constant Hardener” (on an equal par with Condi Rice) is being investigated in Florida for knowingly voting in the wrong district during the February Town of Palm Beach election - a felony. Seems like Florida does actually have a few laws against voting irregularities - who knew?
http://www.crooksandliars.com/2006/06/02.html#a8551
David
June 2, 2006 at 10:42 pm
31Cooper,
We have pretty clear, pretty comprehensive, generally sound election laws (major exception is the hangover from the Old South of making it pure hell for a felon to regain voting rights). We have a chief executive and had a chief state election official for whom those were merely obstacles to be overcome, and overcome them they did, as did the team in Ohio in ‘04 (Bobby Kennedy, Jr. has a good overview of what all transpired there).
The laws were written to give the will of the voters primacy and the county election officials the right to determine as clearly as possible the will of the voters, which most of Florida’s county supervisors were gladly doing when the Supreme Court intervened and appointed Bush president.
SeattleDan
June 2, 2006 at 11:16 pm
32Geez,coop,bad news for the Coulter,what with a new book due out any minute (BTW I dont carry it but will be happy to special order if for anyone,but am not holding my breath),on the subject of the religion of “liberalism”.
David, message received,many thanks,and expect an email response soon.
ginny
June 3, 2006 at 12:44 am
33The little device… well, before the show starts, the pre-show gets pretty debauched. It’s entirely out of keeping with the show’s dignified and serious approach to news quizzery, and is probably designed to keep the audience confused, cowed, and disinclined to shout out answers.
Sharon
June 3, 2006 at 9:46 am
34David,
I heard scurrilous rumors about people on the CT Gold Coast with winter homes in FL voting twice in the presidential elections, once in person in CT and once by absentee ballot in FL. Is there any mechanism in place that’s supposed to prevent that? I know the problem isn’t exclusive to Florida.
cooper
June 3, 2006 at 11:13 am
35David, ooops, I guess I stepped in it, huh? Sorry pal, the thought of Coulter out in the hot Florida sun breaking rocks and smearing mascara got me revved. I guess you’re not ordering Ann’s book from SeattleDan … I didn’t think so. I would recommend anyone needing a hard to find book, to send SeattleDan an e-mail. It worked great for me. There you are, an unsolicited testimonial.
Sharon, when they die, they can vote in Chicago, too. (Drum roll!) ;-D
George C
June 3, 2006 at 12:35 pm
36A preponderance of Felbers?
A notion of Felbers?
A scream of Felbers?
A riot of Felbers?
An ironic of Felbers?
Dale
June 3, 2006 at 2:03 pm
37Can anyone explain why “felber” is such a funny word? It doesn’t fit the Sunshine Boys rule of comedy (or was that Woody Allen?) that “k” is funny (chicken, pickle, wookie etc…). There is something about it’s similarity with “flubber” but that doesn’t explain why “flubber” is funny…
Dale
June 3, 2006 at 2:05 pm
38Oh, and how about a “terrorist cell of Felbers”? Just to give those NSA boys something to do the next time you plan a family get-together.
Hot Tub Tommy
June 3, 2006 at 5:59 pm
39HOLY CHRIST ON A CRUTCH!!! $96,774.18 charged to my Visa card?! One Toyota Prius and one Honda Accord Hybrid?? Mary Mother of God!! CHRISTINE!! What were you doing in Valdosta, Georgia and what in the FUCK did you need to buy 2 cars for?!! Christine!!! This is my “special” no limit card that you’re not supposed to touch, that I keep locked in the secret safe in the wine cellar!! Wait a minute - you don’t have the combination to that safe. I haven’t even told you about that safe… LEMUEL!
cooper
June 3, 2006 at 11:21 pm
40My stars! Mr. Delay seems a mite vexed.
Dale - “terrorist cell of Felbers” - that would work. I’m sure Adam appreciates the old adage that there is no such thing as bad publicity. Well, maybe someone should draw the line somewhere.
Sharon
June 4, 2006 at 1:20 pm
41Adam, nice write-up on WWDTM in today’s New York Times Arts & Entertainment section. Congratulations!
dee
June 4, 2006 at 1:49 pm
42Sharon, thanks for reminding me to check the Times for that article about Murra…I mean…WWDTM. Gosh I’ve NEVER been an early adapter of something trendy before. Hope this doesn’t mean the show will meet the same fate once described by Yogi Berra: “Nobody goes there anymore. It’s too crowded.”
SeattleDan
June 4, 2006 at 2:34 pm
43Here’s the link, I hope.Congrats,Adam and Murray.Great stuff!
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/06/04/arts/television/04brenn.html?_r=1&or ef=slogin
Ann
June 4, 2006 at 3:46 pm
44Did everybody know about the interview with Murray except me? I used to feel like one of the cool kids here, but now I’m completely out of touch. Was it the 10 days I spent in Iowa last month?
Murray, how’d they track you down? And what’s this “a gathering…that HE’S calling Felberpalooza” crap? How many times do I have to say that the name was MY idea! OK, maybe I’m doing absolutely nothing to help plan it—and I’m not ever sure I’ll be able to attend—but I distinctly remember suggesting the event. I think it was in lieu of contributing to PayPal.
Anyway, nice write-up, guys! I’m chagrined to admit that I wasnt aware at the time of the format change from phone-in to live-with-audience, but it does make a difference.
cooper
June 4, 2006 at 7:14 pm
45Okay, sports fans listen up. One of our favorite authors here at SportsCentral, Mr. Charles P. Pierce, has written another OMGROTFLMAO pean to those wacky Conservatives at “The Weekly Standard”. Enjoy.
http://www.prospect.org/web/page.ww?section=root&name=ViewWeb&articleI d=11603
cooper
June 4, 2006 at 7:22 pm
46Ooops, my bad - not “The Weekly Standard”, but “National Review”. My wackiness meter must be on the fritz again.
Murray
June 4, 2006 at 11:18 pm
47Uhhh… As I pointed out on the May 17th episode, (#26) I spent 3/4 of an hour with her to misquote me in a total of 6 lines. Oh well, I’ve been to this movie before.
What I said was that the program is at 11:00 on Saturday when I’m normally busy with tours or other work. Although I did mention that I usually pick up the broadcast on line later.
The rest of the stuff is pretty accurate.
I said lots of good things about Adam, Peter, Carl, Charlie, Roxanne, and the folks at the FA blog but that seems to have been left on the cutting room floor.
How did they find me? Probably at random, you know, phone people till they get someone who has heard of the show… I assume they contacted the WWDTM folks who are aware of Felberpalooza and know of me indirectly.
Ann, you are the spark for this conflagration. Your special place of honor is not in question.
SeattleDan
June 4, 2006 at 11:48 pm
48Not suprising,Murray.I have been quoted before in the press where the answer printed is not the same as the quesiton I was asked.Nevertheless.you do come off well in the article,which,in truth,is more about WWDTM,than Adam.
Thanks for the link,coop.Very funny from Mr.Pierce.Both SeattleTammy and I enjoyed it.
Murray
June 4, 2006 at 11:50 pm
49“Mr. Schrotenboer’s devotion is such that in September he will be the host of a gathering of “Wait, Wait” fans that he’s calling “Felberpalooza” in honor of the publication of Mr. Felber’s first novel.”
Uhh… This was wrong too. I mentioned that the party would probably be called Schrodinger’s Ball to tie in with the novel and that information on both would be at www.schrodingersball.com
Neither name is mine. (Just that Schrotenboer thing around my neck)
Ann
June 5, 2006 at 1:51 am
50Ah. May 17—that explains it. Iowa doesn’t get the Internet on odd-numbered days. Please forgive my peevishness.
The only reason I’m not sure whether I can attend the conflagration is that my boss won’t give me my summer travel schedule. Very frustrating.
I’m a big fan of Paula Poundstone’s, too. Any chance she’ll be attending?
Mary
June 5, 2006 at 12:34 pm
51“Hail to the Victors valiant; Hail to the conquering heroes…..” (Wasn’t there a commercial with one of the space capsules playing this?)
Murray- sadly it is true, unless I can trade out my vet hospital rotation time. First year tech students are the unlucky grunts
JR
June 5, 2006 at 4:25 pm
52Re: the NYT article
Whoever did the spreadsheet: please, back away from the keyboard, slowly, and go find your life. It’s lost, it’s lonely, it needs you. Really.
Murray
June 5, 2006 at 5:57 pm
53JR,
That poor guy spends 6 years slaving over a spread sheet, he hits the big time by getting mentioned (as a loony) in the NY Times and they don’t even print his name. (Perhaps out of pity).
cooper
June 5, 2006 at 6:23 pm
54Mary, really! You’ll be cleaning litterboxes instead of partying on @ Felberpalooza? Oh, and such a sad picture that is, indeed. I do have a theory about the cat/human order of dominance - they see us cleaning their litterbox and get the wrong idea about who’s in charge. That image never leaves their tiny little feline brains. From then on, the arrogance is overpowering and unbearable. Trust me.
Maysa
June 6, 2006 at 5:29 am
55Whatever would be the name but Felbers always rocks! Happy birthday to Mother Felber! I think the celebrations were nice,seems obvious from the pics.
David
June 6, 2006 at 9:48 am
56Ann,
Iowa is also known to suck out basic brain functions (but not basic human decency) on even-numbered days, especially out in the corn deserts - kind of in solidarity with my beloved rural South. This loss of basic brain function also occurs in a great swath of the Heartland and the former Slave States on the first Tuesday in November of even-numbered years.
And today is 6-6-6, which is also the most commonly used citrus fertilizer, so Florida is like triply cursed.
cooper
June 6, 2006 at 11:21 pm
57David, I waited to write my rent check until today and since it is indeed 6-6-6, I’m hoping the sorry sumbitch landlord is superstitous or cripplingly religious and will be too afraid to cash that evil check. Well, one can always hope.
David
June 7, 2006 at 7:52 pm
58Cooper,
Your are evil. I love it. But since 6-6-6 is apparently a translation error - at least according to the Daily Show (or was it on FA?) Trying my damndest to remember what they decided the Mark of the Rove is actually supposed to be.
Stephen
June 8, 2006 at 10:28 am
59David,
I remember that from WWDTM, I think they said it was 606, some where in Michigan, I think.
David
June 8, 2006 at 4:39 pm
60Yeah, I think you’re right, Stephen. This means, of course, that the entire month of June in every ‘06 is a contender. If the Great Whatever doesn’t occur in the next 23 days, we’re safe for another century (if one doesn’t count global warming, the growing gap between haves and have nots, the energy catastrophe, the continuing drift toward the Third Crusades, and the horrifying possibility that the United States will remain a right-wing one-party state.)